Should parents consume less alcohol in front of their kids? It has been proven that the kids of parents who drink around them are more likely to start drinking at an earlier age. Also, the more the parents drink, the more the kids usually will. I personally don’t believe its bad for parents to drink in front of their kids, as long as no personality change is visible. Parents need to set a good example and model good behavior in order to develop a sensible attitude toward drinking for the child. If parents are not able to model good behavior, then they are more than likely not able to properly care for their children. What would happen if there was an emergency, but the parent was to drunk to properly respond? I also think that when parents come home drunk it induces a positive attitude toward that type of behavior. The child views it as well my parents do it so it must be ok.
I baby sit for this family where the mom often comes home a little drunk. It’s not usually too bad, but I can definitely tell a personality change; she gets really loud and really scatterbrained. However, one night she comes home belligerently drunk and goes straight to her bedroom. The little girl I was babysitting usually takes her nighttime showers in her mom’s room. When we went into her bathroom there was throw up all over the floor, obviously the mom had missed the toilet. Then we hear the mom being completely goofy and then crying hysterically on the bed. Two minutes later she was passed out on top of all the covers in her cocktail dress. Her daughter then started cracking up; she thought this was absolutely hilarious. To her, her mom was just so silly. To make things worse, my 10-year-old step sister was also at the house, and she viewed this type of behavior as funny and normal too; her mom has come home countless times reeking of wine and just passed out on her bed. This is what all adults do, right? I think this type of behavior is absolutely pathetic and irresponsible. I definitely didn’t want my little step sister to think this was ok or for her to think that people are funny when they get drunk. I think parents should set a better example for their kids in order to postpone drinking as long as possible. What do you all think?
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4 comments:
I think that it is ok to drink some and not in excess amounts as long as you explain to your kids about alcohal. It isn't illegal.
No, drinking is not illegal, and getting drunk in private isn't illegal either. But the woman Britt describes here is probably an alcoholic. It sounds like she abuses alcohol and is neglecting her responsibilities as a parent. If I were the babysitter in this case, I would not leave the house until the mother sobered up--unless the father was also present and in a condition to be a responsble parent. And I would call the mother the next day and ask to have a talk with her about maybe seeking some counseling for her problem. She's probably in denial, but having the danger of this situation pointed out to her when she is sober could be the first step toward a substance abuse program.
I want to add one more thought about this: do you think the child's behavior might have been a cover for fear and/or embarrassment? I can't imagine that a child would not be upset by seeing his or her mother out of control of herself. My own mother was the daughter of an alcoholic mother, and she remembers the shame she felt when her mother showed up at school to drive some children to an event and was told she could not because she was too drunk. Having an alcoholic mother made my own mother very introverted and shy and insecure. Parents who drink too much need to recognize that they are abusing their children.
When you are caring for someone else’s children, sometimes it can become a touchy issue on what is crossing the line. Most parents want the best for their kids, but what do you do when the parents come home drunk and are incapable of properly caring for their kids. They assure you that you can leave, but your gut reaction is to stay around and make sure everything turns out all right. The parent might be offended at first, but hopefully the next day they will realize that it was the best decision. I like cec’s idea of talking to the parent once they have sobered up. The news may be harsh, but in order to fix anything you have to know what is wrong in the first place.
As for the kids in these types of situations, how do they handle seeing their parents act like children themselves? Some kids, like the ones in my post choose to laugh it off and act like it doesn’t bother them. But how could it not? If my mother had shown up at school events reeking of alcohol, I would be mortified. Maybe around my friends I would try to put on a smile, but deep down I would feel sorry for my mom. What does it say about how she views her life, if she can’t even make it through the day with out getting messed up? Parents need to realize what they do also effects their children. Another question I want to ask is: do you think the children raised by alcoholic parents are more likely to abuse their own children in the same way later down the road?
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